Busy month ahead

Just doing my planning after i had done one the last time for my summer. I found that i quite like that idea of planning ahead.

So April is coming soon. After i had drafted out my key dates, i was like "Oh My Gosh". It is like if i'm able to complete 1 full topic a day, i will be able to meet the deadlines for everything. With 1 or 2 days rest for the whole month.

Well, things are piling up before i came back from singapore. Missing 2 weeks of uni really means quite a lot. From the look of it, my mind tells me that it will be a challenging semester ahead. But the only thing i can do is to do my best with what i'm given. And the rest is when the impossible will become possible. :)

Listening to God

I had noticed especially for the past few days of how to listen to the voice of God. One way is thru praying.

All these years, i always had this one big struggle. Last few days, toward the closing a group shepherd, the person teaching the shepherding lesson ask everyone to pray. I think HS bring me to a verse. When i read that verse, i was in total shock for a moment. Telling God that it is something that my biggest struggle that no one knows, not that i purposely don't want to share it but just that i kept forgetting to let anyone who is shepherding me know. At that point, i acknowledge that yes God, i did struggle with that a lot where in my highest period or lowest period that fear always came to me. When it hits, it really hit hard on me. I realised how much i need God's grace and mercy to be able to truely said what Paul had mention in that verse. I really do want to be able to said what Paul had mentioned in that verse that is my heart desire all these years and even for the years to come, that will still be my heart desire.

A partial or subjective obedient is disobedient. A partial or subjective submission is not submission. A partial or subjective accountablity is not being accountable. I want to be totally obedient to Your Word, a full submission to Your appointed ones and a full accountability to Your annointed ones especially to Your direct appointed annointed one.

A new way of looking at S Day

My S day is coming soon. Every year i had different experiences with my S day. This year, before it comes, i had decided to blog my thoughts down first.

I remember the first S day that i had, i can see the joy in a few people's face. A joy that cannot be fake out. I remembered clearly that most of the people in my caregroup including me go to the subway at hawken drive.

My second S day, my first caregroup leader send me an sms wishing me to grow in God.

My third S day, my ex-shepherd gave me a card. Encouraging me to grow and experienced His unfailing love.

My forth S day, had a chat with my ex-shepherd and let her hold me accountable for this, "i'm convicted that God love me and He never leave me nor forsake me." That at any point in time, especially when i don't feel like it is the truth, to remind me about what i had said that "God love me and never leave me nor forsake me". At the same day, there is a group of student who sang "Happy Birthday" song. Not to me but to their friend, who happened to be celebrating the birthday at that day and that moment. At the moment, my heart is a bit "melted". As i'm thinking that i did so many bad things and wrong things, so unworthy of any care or concern by anyone.

Now come my fifth S day soon. This year, i decided to make a bit of changes to the way i view S day. In the past few years, i'm always looking for how i want or wish my shepherd or leader to encourage me or bless my heart. But this year, i want to be a blessing to the people that God has placed in my life.